“I will remain quiet and will look on from my dwelling place.” (Isaiah 18:4)
In this passage, Assyria is marching against Ethiopia. In this passage from Isaiah he is saying that as the army advances, God makes no effort to stop them. It’s like the army will be allowed to do whatever they choose. Until… “before the harvest” (v. 5), the entire proud army is defeated as easily as new growth is pruned from a vine.
The commentary on this passage from Streams in the Desert went on to say that the truth that God waiting in silence and watching is clearly “not to be confused with His passive agreement or consent. He is simply biding His time and will arise at the most opportune moment,” just when it feels as though the plans of the wicked are about to succeed.
As I read this during prayer this morning, I thought about all the turmoil in our country today and the question maybe we’ve all asked at different times, “why is God letting this happen?” And then I remembered Day 6 of my most recent 8-Day Silent Retreat. I had spent six days in anguish and turmoil trying to figure out why all the temptations to self-doubt and confusion were assaulting me all at once. It was like an army of temptation was advancing and as much as I cried out to God to help me understand, to lift the desperate confusion I was feeling, no understanding came to me.
And then on the evening of Day 6, I spent three hours begging God to help me see. And finally, completely spent with not another ounce of energy to give, I stopped begging and emotionally accepted that this was the battle I was in at this moment. It was in that moment that I heard God’s gentle voice say to me, “Don’t worry, you’re fine.” And while I had felt God’s presence during my turmoil that week, in that moment God was truly as close to me as my breath.
What does my story have to do with Isaiah’s words? As my retreat ended and I was asked to gather up all the Graces I felt I had received that week, the most important one for me was the Grace of my anguish that evening. I have spent my life attempting to manage and or figure out how to take care of myself, figure things out, and rely on myself. And I believe God has waited patiently until I was ready to surrender my desire for complete control of my life. And I believe He watched patiently that week, always giving me the strength and the Grace not to fall into desolation but allowing me to feel the onslaught of the army as I tried to go it alone. And then at the opportune time He acted. And from that anguish I have received the Grace to surrender my desire to go it alone and I pray daily to be more present to His presence that I may remember to turn to Him in moments of joy and confusion.
In the midst of all the turmoil in our country and in our world, I am comforted by the reminder that God has this. That even if at times it may appear that the voices of hate are having their way with us and that those voices will prevail. God “has his finger on each of our pulses and is extremely sensitive to even the slightest change.” And as in the time of Isaiah, “before the harvest,” God will act.
This is a time for prayer and action. Prayer that those whom God calls to be voices and leaders in this time of turmoil, will listen and act as they are called to act. It is also a time for hope. Hope in the One who is not passive but who sees all and is waiting for “the most opportune moment.”
(Excerpts taken from Streams in the Desert by L.B. Cowman, July 17th.)